Subodh Sharma

How to settle mutual disagreements?

April 28, 2015

Question

Uncertain in a relation.. How to settle mutual disagreements?

Answer

1. Ask him to give an hour of complete understanding and calmness to discuss your pros and cons of being together. Pros and Cons to you and Pros and Cons to him. Do it at home, not outside.
2. Promise him an hour of complete understanding and calmness in return.
3. Take 2 papers and write down your names. On one paper his name/on one paper your name.
4. Make a line in center and mark Pro+ sign on one side and Con- sign on other side.
5. For first 15 minutes, just write down. Remember DO NOT engage in negative and blaming discussion in this time period. Just write down.
6. Once established PROs and CONs, mark what CONs are you willing to comprise to stay together. Ask him to do the same on his sheet.
7. Now, prioritise as 1,2,3 all the remaining Cons for you and for him.
8. Now take his Con sheet and give him the solution of his Cons as per priority 1,2,3. Think sincerely for him.
9. Give your sheet to him and ask him to solve your Cons in the same way. Ask him to think sincerely for you.
10 . Implement the solutions.
11. Look at yours and his PROs sheet and work further to strengthen them.
12. DO NOT get angry or indifferent during the course of this exercise or you will fail. Stay engaged.
13.Review in one month. Do NOT miss
14. Keep reviewing and strengthening on a quarterly basis

15. If feel better, you both should read the book “Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus”

Cheers!!

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