“If you are just thinking and not literally dragging your friends out of a possible life damaging situation by pulling their hands, you are not a friend”. Subodh Sharma
For one to find happiness, they must be in relationships with other people. Friends are some of the people that we need to get along in life. Fate brings us together with people who later become friends. A friend is an important person in any one of our lives. Friends are the most valuable assets and keeping this in mind, hallmark greeting card founder Joyce Hall in 1930 suggested and formed ‘Friendship Day’. Now it is celebrated on different days in July and August in many Asian and South American countries.
How a friendship is formed? We believe it is like a fruit. A fruit ripens up when all the necessary ingredients and supplies are present in the right mix and quantity, at right time, for the right time. There will always be destroying weather, predators, weeds and fruit-pickers. It is always a friend’s responsibility to steer clear of all dangers and nourish the friendship for life. This is how a friendship is formed!
Different types of friendships are there, but some common traits exist in most of them. To be friends with someone, they have to have some influence on you. Mainly this comes about as a result of shared ideas between the two of you. Friendship has everything to do with complementing one another in a mutual relationship. A friend can be someone you met on the bus or one you have known for a while: it doesn’t matter as long as a quality/trait in the person has some influence on you.
Friendship offers an exchange platform between two people. It can begin with the exchange of ideas and can extend deep into governing our complete lifestyle. There’s no limit to what friends can do for each other, as there’s a bond of understanding and willingness to support between the two. Even where a family member is considered a friend, there has to be something beyond the blood connection to form a friendship. A lot of time this relation thrives on the instinct to help your friend by going out of your way and expecting same when you need any help.
The major function of friendship is to offer support to each other. Friends affect the person you are since they help to shape you. A friend helps you to attain much in life as well as know yourself better. A friend will urge you on since you have an understanding between the two of you. You live a healthier life when surrounded by an array of good friends. Friends are our closest fearless thought-provokers, motivators, go to people in case of trouble, companions in distress and controllers in celebration. True friends will help each other to arrange and provide the right guidance in the real needed times. Friends make each-other believe in their own individual characteristics and compliment the personality.
Ralph Waldo Emerson rightly put it: “The glory of friendship is not the outstretched helping hand, not the kindly smile nor the joy of companionship. It is the spiritual inspiration that comes to you when you discover that someone else believes in you and is willing to trust you with a friendship.”
A friend can see things you do not know about yourself. From his knowledge of you, he can point out many things without fear of how you’ll take it. There seems to be an agreement between friends not only to lookout for each other but also suggest and even sometimes enforce realistic `checks’ on each other. It is the reason why friends play such an important role in each one of our lives.
It is, however, important to remember that if a friend turns foe, he/she can affect your life upside-down. It is because this is a person who knows you very well and is aware of your weaknesses too. A true friend however will never use the adverse circumstances of a past friend to his/her own advantage.
The old wise saying, ‘A friend in need is a friend indeed’ summarizes that there are responsibilities in a friendship. It starts with accepting each other without any judgment. Understanding each other and showing compassion is a responsibility between friends. A friend will have your back, being sensitive to your feelings in all situations. He lets you be, without offering too much unnecessary advice, especially when you are under any emotional distress. Friends share fun times together but are also open, honest and transparent to express concerns to each other. Honesty is vital between friends, to help foster respect and honor. In tough times friends help each other with what they have got. A great responsibility of this relationship is to always protect and help focus a friend on reality if he/she chooses or gets diverted towards a wrong path in life due to any reason. No reason is a good reason for a man/woman to go on a wrong path in life. And no reason is a good reason for a true friend not to stop the one choosing a wrong path! On a better side, it is also a friend’s responsibility to encourage a friend to evaluate and choose a path that is right for them.
You can see that some serious responsibilities come with being friends with someone. None of this is put down as a rule but is what people expect in this relationship.
When you are friends with someone, there are rights that go with it. Friendship is such an open global aspect that it almost demands all the rights available. The friendship rights are primarily formed on the non-tangible values. Respect, openness, transparency, truthfulness, helpfulness, acceptance, availability, forgiveness and unconditional support are just some of the guiding values for the friendship rights. Friendship is about feeling at ease in the presence of another, so much you can open up to them. It gives you complete freedom to express your thoughts. It also binds you to give same right to another person and let them be in on your thoughts without any uncomfortable feeling. Not only that, you trust your friend enough to let him in on some of your deepest emotions and your friend does have the same level of involvement and confidence in you.
Friends have right to say yes and no. Friends also have the right to do the things alone. It should not make them guilty. Friends do have the right to ask questions. If you feel offended, there is some weak link in the friendship that needs to be accessed. Depending on the level of friendship you have with someone, you can decide how much you should open-up with them. You have the right to reserve yourself. You can expect help and support from your friends in the needful times.
When you are in a friendship relationship with someone, several things can happen. You feel secure when in a relationship with a friend. Acceptance is what brings on this security with another and in turn brings out the best in a person. It is easy to be yourself in the company of one who does not judge you. Many people have attained much in life, due to the friendships they have with people in their lives. Friends encourage, motivate, advice and inspire without any inherited benefit to them so they are true well-wishers. Friends also limit and let-loose friends without any consequences so they are the real rejuvenation destinations.
While friends can have a very positive effect on a person, it is important to know that it can also go the other way. Some people have lost direction in life due to friends. It, therefore, matters the kind of people you keep as friends as they will impact your life in a similar way that corresponds to their own lifestyle. It, therefore, calls for caution when deciding on the kind of friendship you are going to have with a person. Some people are only friends of convenience while others get closer than family.
The result of a friendship depends on the kind that you have. If not careful, some friends will pull you out of your destiny by leading you towards the ways you would rather not trend.
The one of the most important reward is that you realize your own potential much faster when in the company of good friends. When in the company of one who encourages and urges you on. A good friend will make you a better person. A friend understands you and will stick with you no matter what. In all sincerity, he will let you know when you go off the way. The rewards of good friendship are many, we believe the biggest rewards are ‘available support’ and ‘freedom to be you’ throughout your life.
It is important that you have a person who is not afraid to face up to you, yet is concerned about the way your life goes. Having a good friend makes you feel accepted thus helping you become a better person in the end. When you feel accepted, you become an entirely new person, and there is no limit how much you can achieve. The best way we can describe the rewards of a friendship is that we improve and become better than we were yesterday. This snowballs into our family, community, and city and further as we enhance our influence circle.
A friend is a true blessing and then even more!